Chapter 268 "Crazy Stone" I couldn't stop laughing
Early the next morning, Xu Nuo quietly slipped from Lin Wanqing's room back to her own room.
He took his mobile phone and scrolled through the hot searches.
"Crazy Stone" is still on the hot search, but another hot search attracted his attention.
#On impulse last night, I promised to write two sets of papers, and I kept writing until midnight!
#Last night I was so strong that I could only reap the consequences.
Clicked on "Crazy Stone", flipped through it, and found a review from one of the film critics I had invited before.
This film critic is called Xu Qing, a native of Jiangcheng, and is known as the conscience of the film critic community.
Since it is conscience, the fees are naturally not cheap. After all, conscience is the most expensive.
His slogan is what a real film critic should do, which is to recommend movies worth watching, discover unknown good works, express technical insights, provide a broad range of historical perspectives, and let good people know The works are not lost in time, exposing marketing lies, etc...
Putting aside what is true or false, this person has been using the same slogan for twenty years, and has a good reputation. He is from the same family and fellow countryman, so I promised to spend a lot of money to hire him.
Judging from the content of the article, this money is not in vain, it is a lavish boast, but it is just right, one point too much is too greasy, and one point too little is too thin.
Idle Master Qing: "This is a classic comedy. Many years from now, countless people will miss this movie. In the new era of comedy, this sentence may not be bragging. I give 9 points, highly recommended. Warning! The following film review contains spoilers, please be careful..."
In addition to Xu Qing, there are many people who have posted long film reviews. These people are all invited by word of mouth. Better, for those who would rather refund the money than give a bad review if the movie is really rubbish.
Word of mouth is what Xu Nuo cares about most. Whether this movie can turn around or not depends entirely on word of mouth. As for whether film critics will give negative reviews, he is not worried at all.
Early in the morning, Qin Bangyan called and brought good news. After yesterday's data performance, the film scheduling rate has increased!
Thanks to the excellent performance on the first day, theaters made adjustments in unison.
Today is the critical moment that determines the outcome. If "Crazy Stone" can continue to maintain its excellent performance, it will only get better and better in the future.
After washing up in the morning, Xu Nuo did not go to work, but went to the cinema with Lin Wanqing with permission.
After the college entrance examination results came out, Xu Xu applied to Jiaotong University in Shanghai. In a few days, the admission results would come out and she would go home.
In the movie theater, Xu Xu volunteered to buy popcorn and Coke.
In the familiar movie theater, she remembered the last time she matched Xu Nuo with Lin Wanqing. At that time, she just used a little trick to get words out of Lin Wanqing.
By the way, he also gave her a doll in the name of a promise. Xu Xu saw that doll in her master bedroom last time.
Li Qi bought two cups of Coke, two buckets of popcorn, and then bought a doll.
It’s true, I know my sister-in-law likes dolls, but I don’t even know to give her a new one. I’m just a straight man. As a result, my sister-in-law still only has the one he gave me.
Xu Xu held Coke and popcorn in his left hand and hid his right hand behind his back. He stumbled up to Lin Wanqing and then brought the doll to her with a smile, "Sister, this is for you!"
Although Lin Wanqing was wearing a mask, her eyes clearly showed a smile of surprise.
"Thank you, Xiaoke." Lin Wanqing took it with a smile, glanced at Xu Nuo intentionally or unintentionally, "Huh, girls are still good at coaxing girls."
Xu Nuo: "... …”It’s broken, it’s coming for me.
Permission: "Hey, I specifically confessed that I bought it."
Xu Nuo nodded with great joy: "Yes, I have a surprise for you."
Lin Wanqing rolled her eyes, pulled Xu Nuo and muttered aside, and left him alone.
In the cinema, Xu Nuo took away a cup of Coke sensibly, leaving one for them, and Xu Nuo gave her another look of approval.
This sister’s pain is really not in vain.
The theater lights go out and the movie starts.
"Besides not being able to urinate and always wanting to pee, what other symptoms are there?"
Bao Shihong frowned on the screen, with a constipated expression on his face.
The sound of dripping water kept ringing. The doctor turned his head and turned off the faucet. Bao Shihong's expression instantly relaxed.
Someone in the cinema let out a few chuckles.
“Let me check you out!”
Bao Shihong's painful expression triggered another burst of laughter.
The joke was created at the beginning. Although it was a little greasy and vulgar, it did not arouse the audience's disgust.
As the story progresses, Xie Xiaomeng bared his big teeth to pick up girls on the cable car, "There is something about you that deeply touched me, a great maternal aura."
At this time, the beauty took off her headphones.
What is playing inside is "Give me a glass of love-free water..."
Although there is only one sentence, this lyric has attracted the attention of many people.
“Hey, it sounds pretty good.”
“Brother, did you sing this?” Xu Xu asked in a low voice.
"Yes." Xu Nuo nodded.
Seeing this, many people took out their mobile phones to search for this lyrics, but found nothing.
"Is it another new song?"
"It's very possible." The audience discussed in low voices.
Xie Xiaomeng felt pain when he stepped on the high heels and dropped the Coke in his hand.
When the movie reached this point, many people did not understand the structure of the movie. Why did two unrelated characters suddenly appear? Who is the protagonist?
The movie continues, Si Yan went to the factory to collect debts, and three thieves pretended to be a moving company to steal.
The Coke can falling from the sky just broke the glass of Bao Shihong's van, and the van rolled away and hit the four-eyed BMW.
Four Eyes said the classic line in the trailer, "Bullshit, high-tech, driverless!"
Hearing the noise, the traffic police let the black man go. people.
Brother Heipidao, Xie Xiaomeng, Siyan and Bao Shihong are connected through such a clever way.
It wasn't until here that someone suddenly realized, "It's so clever. These people are all protagonists, and they are connected by various coincidences."
"It's interesting. I'm starting to look forward to the direction of the story."
"It's a little different from other movies."
At this time, Mike, the international thief who received one hundred thousand US dollars, appeared, dressed handsomely , the handsome figure immediately attracted the attention of the three thieves.
International thieves can only go abroad. When they arrive in China, they get caught directly and the box is stolen.
The huge contrast made the audience burst into laughter.
"I'll beat your lungs out!"
The master appeared on the stage and was tricked by the little thief, which made the audience laugh.
Contrast and comedy, the four waves of people gradually have conflicts and intersections, which makes many viewers become more and more excited as they watch.
"Your clothes are so flashy, you want to go the sexy route? Do you understand that you have to keep a low profile when you are new to the industry?"
Heipi looked down at himself, "Brand! Baleno!"
There is no Baleno in this world, and the promise has not attracted investment, so the Baleno joke can be played boldly.
Three groups of people appeared at the exhibition at the same time, starting a battle to seize the treasure and protect the jade.
The plot advances little by little, the sound of gongs and drums sounds, and the alarm bells sound.
Bao Shihong was stunned for a long time and realized that someone had stolen something.
After Brother Dao reported the false police report, he met Mike who was outside. He mistakenly thought he was a black man. The two Dabi walked up to him, knocked Mike unconscious, and turned around and ran away.
The audience almost laughed like crazy, "The international thieves are so miserable!"
After the trio of Brother Dao escaped from the sewer, Heipi met Bao Shihong who was taking a bath in the bathhouse.
Two people who are struggling at the bottom of society, but are also rivals, are smearing each other with safflower oil at this moment.
Xie Xiaomeng stole the jade and used it to pick up girls, but the person he picked up was Brother Dao's girlfriend.
The three brothers returned home and the music sounded:
"Only when I can't help but feel love and hate, regret is the most painful thing..." "When there are tears in my eyes, don't ask me for whom, just let me forget all this, give me a cup of forgetfulness." Water..."
Xu Nuo also put in the song "Water Forgetting Love" unchanged, and of course it was sung by him.
“This song is great!”
“Is there an original version?” The audience began to search.
"I didn't find it, good guy, it will whet my appetite!"
"I told you there was this song!"
Brother Dao was furious and rushed into the room with a kitchen knife. But he was blocked by two people.
"Murder is against the law! This is the case."
The word crime seems particularly absurd when it comes from the mouth of a thief and liar.
In the background music of "Give me a glass of love-forgetting water, in exchange for me not being sad in my life...", Brother Dao cried loudly.
Gurgling...
"Tell me, did you do it?"
Xie Xiaomeng cried with a sad face, "Oh, I really can't remember."
Heipi pushed him into the toilet.
"I remember, I remember." Xie Xiaomeng cried, "I didn't do it."
"I'm already in bed, and you still say you didn't do it? You think I'm second to none!"< br>
The black-skinned Dabi Dou serves Xie Xiaomeng.
The two were worried that Xie Xiaomeng was thirsty, so they pushed him into the toilet to drink water.
“It’s done, it’s done.”
"You really fucking did it!"
Gurgling, Xie Xiaomeng continued to drink water.
The audience laughed until their stomachs ached.
On the other side, Xiaojun turned off the music, "How could you do something like that? Are you worthy of brother, worthy of me?"
"I'm sorry to him, brother, I'm sorry to him. Are you worthy of big brother?”
"We are all a family. This wealth is not going to outsiders, so we won't suffer, right?"
The male audience in the theater burst into laughter. God, the wealth is not going to outsiders.
Lin Wanqing reached out and pinched Xu Nuo.
Xu Nuo did not dare to say anything. There are many large-scale contents in this movie.
As soon as the scene changed, Brother Dao took his mobile phone and called the police, "My wife let someone else sleep with her, no one cares about it. We are not married, but we have real feelings. Even if we are married, No one cares, there is no law! What the hell kind of lawyer are you, hey, hey!”
The audience's faces were frozen with laughter.
Xiaojun came in with jade, and Brother Dao said another classic line, "You insulted my personality, and you also insulted my IQ!"
Brother Dao was lying in the bathhouse. , bursting into tears, "The world has changed, but there are no good people anymore."
A thief lamented that there are no good people, which makes people laugh out loud.
Mike dropped from the ceiling, but it turned out that the rope was bought by a profiteer. He couldn't reach the jadeite, so he was so angry that he cursed, "I'll punch your lungs out!"
Xiaojun grabbed the fake jade, then put the real jade in, played with Mike some more, and then sounded the alarm.
Bao Shihong arrived and shouted angrily in a hoarse voice, "Is it a public toilet? Come when you want, leave when you want!"
On the other side, Mike was trapped in the vent. , Heipi was trapped in the sewer.
The Dao Brother trio sold the jadeite to Feng Dong, but found out that it was a fake. Only then did they realize that the jadeite given by Xie Xiaomeng was real.
The three of them were busy working blindly, but it turned out that they were working in vain and missed the real jadeite by mistake.
They decided to exchange Xie Xiaomeng for jade.
"We have never done this business. This is kidnapping. Are we unprofessional?"
Bao Shihong and Sanbao, separated by a wall, were dressing their wounds.
Brother Dao said to the mobile phone fiercely: "Are you Xie Xiaomeng's father? Bring the jade to replace him, otherwise I will..."
"Otherwise it will be a fight, right? I know, Thank you, I don’t want to see him all day long.”
The factory manager hung up the phone.
“Hey! Hello!”
In the end, it was Bao Shihong who brought the things to redeem Xie Xiaomeng.
Heipi was in the sewer, trying so hard to get through the phone call, but Brother Dao hung up mercilessly.
“NMLGB!” Heipi’s classic national curse made people laugh out loud.
Brother Dao rode his bicycle and snatched the bag from Bao Shihong's hand, then hit his head on the door that suddenly opened and died on the spot.
At this time, Heipi's phone call came again. The first time, Brother Dao hung up the phone, and the second time, Brother Dao was dead, which was extremely ironic.
Xiaojun was taken away for kidnapping.
Bao Shihong thought he had finally found the real jadeite, so he kept the fake jadeite in his pocket, leisurely and leisurely, but found that the factory had been sold.
After Mike escaped, he happened to meet Heipi climbing out of the sewer, and the two thieves met dramatically.
At the end of the story, Siyan was shot to death by Feng Dong's Baibu piercing Yang's arrow.
Mike killed Feng Dong with a flying knife and took the jade, but found that he had killed his employer.
“I’ll beat your lungs out!”
Bao Shihong bravely captured the international thief!
At the end of the movie, Bao Shihong’s wife, who needs the jade the least, gets the jade.
Heipi had been hungry for several days, grabbed a piece of bread, and ran away frantically on the viaduct, which became a classic scene.
The trio of Brother Dao, one died, one was captured, and the other is on the run.
Mike was arrested, and both of Feng Dong’s eyes died.
At the end of the movie, Huang Bin sang "The light of the right path shines on the earth, illuminating every dark place..."
Singing "The Way of Justice" "Huang Bin, in the end, ran away in embarrassment on the viaduct because of grabbing bread, which is full of irony.
Thieves also have their own ways, robbing the rich and giving to the poor. These so-called chivalrous qualities do not exist in the movie. A thief is a thief, and a thief is a thief.
The theater lights come on.
The audience left the theater one after another, "It was so good."
"Highly recommend this movie."
On July 2, "Crazy Stone" made a counterattack at the box office , a single-day box office of 55 million.
The box office of "Shura" collapsed and dropped to 120 million, and "Myth and Legend" dropped to 110 million.
The first day of harvesting leeks finally gave these movies a backlash.
The one-sided negative reviews on the Internet made the producer, who was originally planning to make another move, very anxious.
However, after careful inspection, I found that these people are really not navy soldiers.
The increase of 20 million for "Crazy Stone" is nothing, but it stands out among a number of movies with box office declines.
The trend is established.
(End of this chapter)