Chapter 1 I’ll cut my brain off for you and fart
Fifty-eight years, summer.
In front of the cesspit outside the wall of Xinjiekou Primary School in the imperial capital.
Li Jiayi raised the corner of his mouth slightly, took out a marlezi from his schoolbag, lit it with a match, and threw it into the cesspool.
Then he ran away. This whole set of movements was smooth and smooth, as if he had practiced it many times.
"Boom!" There was a loud noise.
I heard a drake roaring: "Who is it? Which little brat is setting off firecrackers in the toilet?"
This drake is none other than the teacher of Xinjiekou Primary School Director, a guy who gives power but does not help.
If anyone were in front of the dean at this time, they would find that the dean looked like he had just fought a clay war.
Everywhere on the body was yellow and rotten. There was nothing I could do, Mareko was too powerful.
Especially in the crotch and buttocks, basically everywhere. At this time, there is no way to lift the pants up.
At this time, the culprit Li Jiayi was walking home.
Singing in his mouth: "We people! I am so happy today, we people..."
You must know that he followed the dean for several days before he found this Chance.
Ten minutes later, Li Jiayi arrived at the entrance of a courtyard, No. 7 Ping'an Lane.
This is a courtyard with three entrances and an east-crossing courtyard.
This is not the kind of courtyard house near the root of the imperial city, but a replica built during the Republic of China.
The area is larger than those old courtyard houses, with seven rooms in a row, six inverted rooms, and a door as wide as a room.
When you walk in, you will find the front yard, with three east and west side rooms, six main rooms, plus a hall as wide as a room.
The middle courtyard is similar, but there is no hallway in the middle courtyard. Instead, there is a moon door on the east side of the main house leading to the backyard.
In the backyard, in addition to three east and west side rooms, there are also seven back rooms.
At the same time, there is a moon door leading to the east courtyard leading to the backyard.
The east courtyard has three main rooms and two east wing rooms, which happen to be next to the west courtyard of Courtyard No. 5 next door.
The reason for this is that Courtyard No. 6 is just a quadrangle with two entrances. Courtyard No. 5 and Courtyard No. 7 cover three sides of Courtyard No. 6.
Li Jiayi’s family of five lives in Dongkuaoyuan, and the entire Dongkuaoyuan is his family’s house.
It's been a while since I got off work at this time, so my mother should have already made dinner.
Thinking of eating, Li Jia raised his legs and walked into the courtyard. He had no choice but to eat inactively and had a problem with his thinking.
As soon as I entered the front yard, I saw the old man covering his face and walking around in the yard.
"Hey! Master, what's wrong with your face? Wasn't it because your daughter-in-law slapped you with those two big eggplants?"
"Little bastard, what are you talking about? !" The old man covered his face with one hand and pointed at him with one finger.
"Oh! Look at my mouth." Li Jiayi slapped his mouth a few times and said, "It's terrible to be uneducated. How could I put the word in the wrong place? It's not daughter-in-law, it should be daughter-in-law. I can't tell the difference between the front and the back. Cleared.”
“Little bastard, You..."
"Who are you scolding, old bastard?"
"Old bastard, you are scolding me!"
Li Jia nodded and said, "Oh! Just keep scolding!”
After saying that, he walked to the middle yard and greeted the neighbors in the front yard.
"Hello, Aunt Wu."
"Very well."
"Hello, Uncle Liu."
"Very well."
The neighbors responded to him while looking at the old man. They all wanted to laugh but did not dare to laugh.
These people heard clearly the conversation he had with the uncle just now! The first man, Ying Jiasheng, was a sixth-grade fitter at the No. 2 Steel Rolling Plant, with a salary of 72.3 yuan. He lived in three main rooms on the east side of the front yard.
He is very lustful. He just stares at the young girls and young wives coming in and out of the courtyard. Of course, Li Jiayi’s mother is also among them. This is why he treats her like this. The reason for being a great man.
Sometimes he wonders whether the reason why this great man found an ordinary-looking wife for his son is because he is afraid of picking up the ashes himself.
But I have to say that although the daughter-in-law of this great man looks ordinary, those two big lights are really big.
Soon Li Jiayi came to the middle courtyard, and many people were standing in the yard chatting.
"Hello, Uncle Sun!"
"Very well."
"Hello, Aunt Xu!"
"Okay, is class over for Plus One?"
"Yes! Aunt Xu."
"Huh!" At this moment, a cold snort came from the side.
Li Jiayi turned around and looked over. This person was none other than Shen Yongcai, the second uncle who lived in the middle courtyard.
This guy is not a good bird! He is particularly greedy for money and works in the same factory as Li Jiayi's parents.
The No. 1 Woolen Textile Factory in the Imperial Capital was just not in the same department. Li Jiayi's father, Li Aimin, worked as a supervisor in the logistics warehouse. Because he was injured and retired, he received an administrative salary of Level 2, fifty-six yuan a month.
It is equivalent to a college student becoming a regular student.
Li Jiayi’s mother, Ye Xin, is the director of the factory’s publicity department, administrative level 24, with a monthly salary of 43 yuan, which is equivalent to a sixth-level clerk.
The second uncle, Shen Yongcai, works as an accountant in the Finance Department, a sixth-grade clerk, with a salary of 43 yuan, the same as Li Jiayi's mother's salary.
"Why are you humming? If you hum again, I will cut off my brains and fart for you." Li Jiayi glared at the second uncle and said.
"You..."
"Close your trap."
After saying that, Li Jiayi walked back because he was anxious to go home for dinner!
Because he didn't have to go into the backyard, he didn't meet anyone in the backyard, let alone the third uncle who lived in the backyard.
To say that this third uncle is not a thing, he can be described as a sinister villain.
Of course, there are many people in this courtyard who are not things, such as the Shi Zhen family who lives in the front yard, and Hai Dafu who lives in the backyard.
As soon as he stepped into Dongkuaoyuan, Li Jiayi shouted: "Mom, I'm back."
"You brat, you still know how to come back! Why did you go?" "Don't look at how long it has been."
Dad Li Aimin leaned on the door frame, smoking a cigarette and shouted to Li Jiayi.
Li Jiayi scratched his head helplessly. He couldn't say that he went to blow up the cesspool!
Seeing that he didn't speak, Li Aimin became even more angry and said: "You didn't see me standing here! If you don't ask me, you will find your mother when you come back, go out, and come in again."
" Oh!"
Li Jiayi retreated outside the Moon Gate and then came back in and asked: "Dad, where is my mother?"
"Poof!"
"Pfft!"
"Hahaha!"
The eldest sister and the second sister couldn't hold it in any longer, so they ran out of the house and hugged their bellies, laughing.
The eldest sister smiled and said: "Hahaha, little brother, you are so interesting."
The second sister nodded and said: "Yes, you can see how depressed dad is."
"Okay, go wash your hands and eat." My mother came out of the kitchen with the food and said.
Mom had spoken, and dad didn't dare to say anything no matter how depressed he was. He could only glare at him and go into the house.
(End of this chapter)