Chapter 166 Want to be a dog
"If I jump, will Haruno always remember it?"
This sentence that came out for no reason was carried lightly in the night wind, making Haruno Sawayama slightly startled.
But he quickly reacted and said in a deep voice: "Even if I don't jump, I will always remember it."
The atmosphere seemed to be in a deadlock, but as if he didn't notice it at all, he took two steps forward and walked to Esaki Suguha, shrugged and said: "Why are you asking such a strange question? We are also friends, so let's talk It’s not something I won’t forget, and I’m not a passerby.”
"That's right." Suguha Esaki said in a low voice.
"I feel like you've been inexplicably negative these past two days." Haruno Sawayama looked into the distance and asked casually, "What's the matter?"
"."
"Suguha has asked me to live in such a high-end place. If possible, I would also like to help solve the problem."
"It's a family matter." Suguha Esaki turned away and whispered, "Even if Haruno wants to help, he can't help, right?"
help?
How can I help? Can Haruno stop his uncles' arrangements?
Even the character called "Father" can only escape this responsibility by running abroad, let alone her.
"If you can't solve it, it's okay to listen."
Haruno Sawayama, who was standing aside, seemed much more careless.
Looking at the Kyoto city with thousands of lights below, he unconsciously raised the corners of his mouth a little, and said with a smile: "Don't look at me like this, but I am actually surprisingly suitable for being a "trash can"."
"You can see that."
Esaki Suguha nodded, her expression inexplicably calm.
She was thinking that since the other party was so persistent, should she tell a part of it?
The tall girl hesitated a little, but after all, it was related to her family affairs, and besides, it was hard to talk about being arranged for a blind date.
As for the mother, it feels even more difficult to talk about.
The words I said that day, "If I hadn't been able to give birth to you," are still lingering in my ears to this day.
That deep feeling of fatigue has been lingering around me. It is different from the feeling when practicing kendo. This time it is obviously more "tired" and it is more difficult to cheer up.
"Haruno, remember that being a person actually costs money."
In the end, she said something that made people feel a little baffled.
Sawayama Haruno on the side naturally turned his head to stare at her in confusion.
"cost?"
"Well, cost." Esaki Suguha nodded lightly and said slowly, "People will only remember some things they think are important, and then ignore things they think are unimportant, just like the elementary school classmates, Haruno is now Can you still remember everyone’s names?”
"I really don't remember."
Sawayama Haruno said very honestly.
He couldn't even remember his full name when he was still in elementary school, let alone now.
"That's the truth. The cost is what kind of things you have experienced with the other person, and what kind of feelings it will leave behind. Whether it is a good or bad mood, it will become the cost of remembering others."
"However, once there are more things to remember, you have to make a decision again to see which side costs more and is more important to you, so you pay attention to which things to remember first." Suguha Ezaki vocal channel.
"I probably understand."
Haruno Sawayama touched his chin and said casually: "It's true that compared to college classmates and high school classmates, the names of junior high school classmates have become much more blurry. There were a few who played well with me at that time, but now I can only remember them. It looks vague, but I can’t remember the name.”
"So, sometimes I envy some people who can always remember others."
Esaki Suguha pursed her lips and said with a haggard look, "It seems like no one will remember me in particular."
"Really? I think Suguha is quite eye-catching, right?" Haruno Sawayama turned around, leaned against the railing and said slowly, "She is very beautiful, she has won many awards in kendo, and she is from a wealthy family. The eldest lady is extremely rich."
"Then, the most important thing is that Suguha, who has the above-mentioned title, is actually several times worse than ordinary people."
He paused and joked: "If I were Suguha's classmate, I would have been deeply impressed and remembered for a lifetime."
"."
The corners of Esaki Suguha's mouth twitched slightly, revealing a silent smile.
After a moment, she explained in a low voice: "That impression is only temporary. People come and go in the Jade Dragon Banner arena, and no one will always remember someone, not even the champion, because There is always the next champion, the next champion.”
"The same goes for being beautiful and having a rich family. They will soon forget this after they no longer interact with each other. Can Haruno still remember which classmate in elementary school and junior high school was the richest?"
"I really don't remember." Haruno Sawayama coughed dryly.
Didn't pay attention at all.
He seemed a little unable to convince the other party in this regard.
It's not that he's not good at this kind of debate, but it's because he is the kind of person who doesn't pay too much attention to outsiders.
If you are not particularly good at remembering a certain classmate, let alone explaining Ezaki Suguha's concerns here.
"Even if it is remembered, it doesn't mean anything. It's just like feelings can deteriorate or change one's heart." Esaki Suguha suddenly said.
"However, there should be some people who can always remember another person." Her eyes gradually shifted to Haruno Sawayama's face, and she said softly when she looked at him, "It's just that my luck is too bad. ”
"The future is still far away, so you don't need to worry too much about this kind of thing." Haruno Sawayama stared at the other person for a while and continued, "There will be at least three opportunities for others to remember you, so don't worry. "He's not very good at dealing with this kind of psychological problem.
There is no way. If in his previous life, when he was seventeen or eighteen years old, he could have talked nonsense with the other person here for an entire night, chatting about the other person's transformation from a passive person to a sunny character, and all kinds of big words full of life philosophy. Picking it up at your fingertips is guaranteed to keep this tall girl who likes philosophical questions docile.
But it's a pity that his mood now is different from before.
Now he pays more attention to what he has to do and what he is responsible for.
Sentimental always feels like a poet who has seen through the world, talking big words, and inexplicably trying to pull out a lot of truths to explain the girl's worries. It has been so long ago that he can hardly remember it.
Alas, it would be great if the person standing in front of me now was Maki Miyazawa, who was sad and sad. I didn't have to think so much at all. I could just go up and block the other person with my mouth, and then do it a few more times, and any problem would be solved.
Hey, tell me why you have such strange thoughts
Sawayama Haruno took a deep breath. He must have been infected by Maki after they dated.
No, no, we can’t accept such “simple and crude” ideas or those ideas that pretend to see through life. It’s better for people to be more pragmatic.
"What's wrong?"
After coming back to his senses, Haruno Sawayama noticed that Suguha Esaki in front of him seemed to be thoughtful again.
"without"
"oh--"
Sawayama Haruno didn't think much and said casually: "By the way, if you keep standing here and looking at the scenery, you will soon get tired of it, right?"
"Have you had your late night snack, Suguha? Do you want to go down and have something to eat with me? To be honest, I'm a little hungry after typing all day long," he said with a smile.
"Supper?"
Esaki Suguha subconsciously touched her belly.
In fact, she was not very hungry, but there seemed to be no reason to refuse the other party's invitation.
And she actually has some selfish motives of her own.
After feeling Haruno reach the top of the mountain, selfishness appeared inexplicably in his heart.
No. It might have appeared earlier.
At least I want Haruno to always remember me.
Because he was able to maintain his relationship with Maki for such a long time without losing half of it. This shows that Haruno is actually the kind of person he wants to find.
——A person who will always remember what he looks like now.
Although there was a fleeting thought before, Esaki Suguha felt that she was still calm and would not really run away to seek death.
But after returning from Kyoto, faced with her mother's questioning and the pressure from her uncles, she would definitely be left with the only option of going on a blind date. By then, she would definitely be arranged by her family to live a life she didn't want at all. What's the difference between life and death?
No, actually just die.
That's why I want someone to remember that I can still be considered barely free.
If it was Haruno, he would definitely remember it. But the premise is that he must leave enough "costs".
As for the so-called "cost price", she had actually thought about it a long time ago.
Rather, it was something that I had already considered clearly the night before I set off for Kyoto.
"Haruno."
Walking behind him, Suguha Esaki suddenly called Haruno Sawayama in front of him.
The latter paused and turned back in confusion.
"What's wrong?"
"Do you like dogs?"
"Dogs are okay. Although I have a cat at home, I don't hate dogs very much." Haruno Sawayama said casually.
"Do you like dogs?"
"If you raise it yourself, of course you will like it."
".Yeah?"
Esaki Suguha smiled slightly.
The wind blew suddenly from the top of the mountain behind him, causing Haruno Sawayama to feel a stinging sensation in his eyes.
Such a familiar scene also stopped him completely in place. When he looked back again, what he saw was not the beautiful scenery with white powder and no trace of impurities.
——But something that gradually breaks into pieces in the wind, crystal clear.
"Let's go."
Esaki Suguha blinked and suddenly accelerated to the position in front of him.
"I feel a little hungry too. Let's go eat early."
"Oh, okay"
With some confusion, Haruno Sawayama quickened his pace.
(End of chapter)