Chapter 90: Ask Him (please order first)

Chapter 90: Ask Him (please order first)

After the recording, Qi Long began to divide into groups. He called Meng Hetang, who was good at making appearances, to form a group of two.

"I'll measure it for you. I have a good book that I picked up on the way back from Hangzhou. It's suitable for you!" Qi Long said with a smile.

Before Qi Long joined Deyun Society, Xiao Meng's characteristics were not obvious. Qi Long's impression of him was that he was a cross talk actor who looked upright and acted in a relatively regular manner, but occasionally mixed garlic in his mouth and ate chestnuts.

After arriving, I found that Xiao Meng was gradually working towards the Prime Minister, and the audience was very happy with it.

This is very similar to an actor with a similar name in another world. Therefore, Qi Long felt that the program "Pan Him" ​​was very suitable for the current Xiao Meng, so he gave it to him.

That night, just like Qin Xiaoxian's "Sheep on a Tree", Qi Long and Meng Hetang worked on it very late.

Xiao Meng was a little nervous when he came, but after reading the book, he felt it was reliable. When he left, he was full of confidence!

The next day there was a cross talk performance, and a group of female students from the Drum Club, smart staff, etc. came back as the audience. Meng Hetang insisted on giving the chance to draw lots to Qi Long, and as expected, he got the first place. Come on stage.

"Now please enjoy the cross talk "I Want You to Be Popular", performed by: Meng Hetang, Qi Long!"

The audience were all members of the family, so they naturally applauded vigorously. The two of them did not go directly to the stage from the side curtain, but went down from the side stage to the auditorium. Meng Hetang walked faster, while Qi Long walked slowly and listlessly. .

Meng Hetang turned around: "Uncle, Master!"

"Um?"

"Did you memorize the words I gave you yesterday?"

"What words are you memorizing? I'm busy falling in love!" Qi Long waved his hand indifferently.

There was a sudden booing from below, especially the girl student from the Drum Club, who cast many eyes on Zhang Wanyi.

"Uncle Master, you can't forget your profession when you fall in love. I still hope to become an instant success this time!"

Qi Long patted his shoulder impatiently: "Don't worry, I will make you famous today. Look, Zhang Helun became famous because of my inspiration, right? Qin Xiaoxian became famous because of my stage teaching, right? Gao Dongqiang was even more inspired by me Treat him like your own son, right? It’s your turn this time!”

"But you haven't memorized any of the words!"

"There is no need for words in cross talk, just listen to me. Later you will praise yourself and belittle others. You have heard of it, people have to stand on the shoulders of giants."

Meng Hetang felt aggrieved: "Uncle, that one seems to be called Newton!"

"Foreigners have to pronounce their names backwards. His words tell us that when people step down, they will rise up!"

Meng Hetang retorted: "People who step on others do not necessarily get higher!"

"But it must be great!" Qi Long showed a mean expression.

The two circled around the bottom of the stage and turned towards the stage.

Qi Long, who was listless in the audience just now, immediately showed a professional fake smile and looked energetic, but Meng Hetang still looked unsure. As soon as the two bowed, Meng Hetang started to giggle: "Hehehehe!"

He glanced back at Qi Long, then turned around and smiled awkwardly.

"Why don't you sit down and head down? Crosstalk is for entertaining others, not for yourself. Just talk!"

"say what?"

"Praise yourself!"

"In which direction?"

"Don't you have any merit in yourself?"

Meng Hetang raised his fingers and made a gesture of cracking them, but his expression changed from thoughtful to melancholy, and the audience immediately became happy.

This is the way to make people laugh. The disadvantage is that you have to watch it live or watch the video. If it is audio, you will wonder why the audience is inexplicably happy?

Therefore, it is not suitable to listen to Xiang Xiang’s cross talk with your eyes closed before going to bed!
Meng Hetang looked at Qi Long for help. Qi Long sighed and told him:

"Let me give you an analogy. Take my recent relationship as an example. If the girl is beautiful, you will praise her for her beauty. If she is beautiful and you cannot praise her, you will praise her for her good figure. If she is not good for her figure, She has temperament; if she doesn’t have temperament, praise her for her kindness!”

Meng Hetang nodded in sudden realization: "Oh, my uncle's girlfriend is very kind!"

Everyone immediately burst into laughter, what a high-level harm to others!
Qi Long raised his foot and kicked it from outside the table: "I asked you to praise yourself by drawing inferences from one instance, but what are you talking about my girlfriend for?"

"I won't!"

Qi Long asked directly: "How are your basic skills?"

"I'm basically coaxing. My basic skills are okay." He showed timidity when he opened his mouth, but Qi Long interrupted him directly.

"Is this okay? Just say that you are very dedicated. Is that okay?"

Meng Hetang nodded: "Yes, yes, I am a very dedicated cross talk actor. One time I fell ill. I had such a big wound on my body and it was bleeding profusely. It was my turn to go on stage. As soon as the scene was announced, Meng Hetang, what the heck!" He stood up immediately."

"Hey, the show is as big as the sky, good!" Qi Long praised.

"Pull out the infusion syringe, pick up the bottle cap, open it, drink it, and then walk to the stage!"

"Oh, it sounds touching!"

"As I walked toward the stage, there were bloody footprints every step of the way. The doctor was behind me with a needle to sew them up for me!"

"Yes, I remember this!"

Meng Hetang turned around: "Is it true? It's not a lie at all!"

Qi Long nodded repeatedly: "I'm not lying at all. What he had at that time was: hemorrhoids!"

"Ah?" Meng Hetang was confused, and he already laughed if he reacted quickly.

"Don't be happy, everyone, what a touching thing!" Qi Long corrected: "At that time, he had hemorrhoids. A group of us went to the hospital to see him, but he was embarrassed and said he had a blister on his mouth!"

The laughter that had just been stopped because of Qi Long's speech erupted.

"Uncle, you can't sew up hemorrhoids!" Meng Hetang jumped to his feet and shouted.

This time the audience's laughter continued.

"That's right. Why are you talking about doctor? If you don't tell them, they might just believe it. Forget it, stop praising yourself and belittling others!"

"Who are you belittling?" Meng Hetang asked.

Qi Long inspired him: "Who do you hate most in Deyunshe?"

Meng Hetang clapped his fingers: "Luan Yunping, Xiao Taoyang, Shaobing Xiaosi Yan Hexiang, Zhang Yunlei, Yang Jiulang, Qi Long and Gao Dongqiang."

"Huh?" Qi Long was feeling proud when he suddenly expressed doubts.

Meng Hetang glanced at Qi Long and quickly made amends: "I respect and love them all. Except for them, I hate everyone else."

The audience immediately shouted: "Guo Degang!" Meng Hetang immediately answered: "Guo Degang is my master, I respect him!"

"Yu Qian" shouted again from the audience.

"That's my godfather!"

"Gao Feng!"

"That's the head teacher."

"Wait a minute." Qi Long couldn't help but interrupt the audience's shouts and Meng Hetang: "You don't dare to say anything to anyone? I'll pick one, you say Yue Yunpeng!"

"Ah, this is Senior Brother Yue Yunpeng."

"Do you want to be popular?"

Meng Hetang immediately gritted his teeth and began to accuse Yue Yunpeng: "Yue Yunpeng, let me tell you, I hate him the most. He participated in a show last year and became popular. He didn't even look at people backstage!"

"oh?"

Meng Hetang closed his eyes: "A man came in backstage, what's your major? He answered me with the word "xiao". Huh, go get me a glass of water. It needs to be 37 degrees 2, do you know?"

"Is there any temperature requirement?"

"No, it forces the junior brother to pour water into his mouth first, warm it with his body temperature and spit it out before he drinks!"

"How disgusting is that thing?"

Meng Hetang continued to close his eyes: "Another person came in: 'What major do you major in?' 'I'm in the Yunzi major.' 'Are you as popular as me? Humph, go outside and buy me a fried dough stick, chew it up and feed it to me! "

"Good guy, he just likes things that have been put in other people's mouths!"

"Another person came in and said, 'What's your word?' 'I don't know the word.' 'Student, come and squeeze his feet!' Teacher Yu Qian squatted there and started to pinch his feet!"

While everyone was laughing, Qi Long turned over his bag and continued to explode: "Fortunately, Brother Qian didn't use his mouth!"

The audience, the actors on the sidelines, including Guo Degang and Yu Qian who scored the score backstage, all couldn't stop laughing.

Yu Qian waved his hand: "Hahahahaha, this baggage is well designed!"

Guo Degang agreed: "It must have been written by Xiao Qi. The first two times it entered my mouth seemed like a small burden, but in fact they were the foreshadowing of this big burden. Senior brother, this deserves extra points!"

"Come on, give me extra points!" Yu Qian waved his hand.

On the stage, Qi Long felt that complaining about Yue Yunpeng was not enough, so he directly asked Meng Hetang to increase his intensity.

"Do you remember what I said? Eat a bite of Tang Monk's meat and you will live forever, and curse Guo Degang to make him red and purple. You call me Guo Degang?"

Meng Hetang gritted his teeth, took a deep breath, and looked like he was about to speak, then gave up: "I don't dare!"

“There is no big or small thing on the stage!”

"There is a new tomb under the stage, the new tomb is next to the old tomb, and the old tomb is Uncle Zhang Helun. I know all this!"

Qi Long had no choice but to say: "Well, you break the news. Think about how much traffic the paparazzi got from breaking the news about celebrities. As your apprentice, you break the little-known secrets of Guo Degang!"

"That's okay. My master often goes to my godfather Yu Qian's house when he's not at home."

Qi Long pushed him: "No one knows it, but everyone knows it. Find Qian Sister-in-law!"

"No, no, he stole the toys from the uncle's house."

"I've never heard of this, so I'm just saying this. What if it's stolen?"

"Pan! Steal the walnuts from other people's homes and use the grease secreted by the human body to make the plate shine." Meng Hetang's expression was extremely rich.

Qi Long's expectation turned into disappointment: "What's the point of this? It's better to say that he plated two braised lion heads, and the oil on his hands showed that he was not normal!"

"Hey, my master not only stole walnuts, he also stole a root carving, a root carving carved into a giant dragon!"

Qi Long nodded repeatedly: "This is valuable. I didn't expect Guo Degang to be such a bad character. Even if he just steals people, he also steals root carvings!"

"Not only did he steal it, he also got angry when he looked at the root carving. The dragon's beard looked like an awl, its scales looked like a blade, and its claws looked like a fork. He got angry just looking at it!"

"This is art, why are you angry?"

"It's dry, numb, and not round at all. Hold him!" Meng Hetang shouted loudly, and then his whole body began to sway back and forth, his head danced up and down, like a long worm twisting, and he said "swish" in his mouth , Kaka” shouted.

Qi Long was shocked: "Is this also a plan?"

"Half an hour later, hey, the root was carved into mahogany. It's all my master's blood. Send him to the hospital quickly. The hospital doesn't have enough plasma, so he can only give him some chicken blood. A dozen chicken blood will help him regain his energy. When I came out of the hospital, I saw a rockery that looked weird and made me angry again. "

"What's wrong?"

"It's dry, numb, and not round at all. Hold him!"

"The chicken blood was wasted!"

"It's not in vain, the rockery has been turned into chicken blood stone!"

"Well, it's more valuable!"

"After we finished arranging the stones, my master met your father!"

"I met my dad!"

"Look at your dad's wrinkles and get angry!"

"Why?"

The uncle and nephew said together: "He's dry, numb, and not round at all. Paddle him!" 】

"Go, go, do you think it's okay to ask my dad?" Qi Long pushed him.

Meng Hetang: "Don't worry, your father has changed after the test is over!"

"Getting younger?"

"No, the plate is shiny, the wrinkles are gone, and your father can sing a song!"

"How to sing?"

Meng Hetang sang: [A round head with not much hair, and if you take away the ears, it’s just a winter melon! 】

"Fuck you!"

At this point, the cross talk ended, the two took a step back and bowed.

Thank you for your support. After entering V, I decided to try my best to turn each chapter from 2,000 words to 3,000 words. On the first day, we will update it with 10,000 words to give back to all the book lovers who support me. Thank you!
　

(End of this chapter)