Chapter 213 Counter-scene: Who asked Luan to play the fool?
Guo Degang flew over the next day. When he arrived at the theater in the afternoon, the two apprentices took turns complaining. Listening to their operations, Lao Guo also raised his head and laughed.
"What a loss!"
"The upper beam is not straight and the lower beam is crooked!" Qi Long pretended to be casual and said.
"What are you talking about!" Guo Degang stood up immediately: "Do you want me to wash your clothes?"
"Hahahaha!" Qi Long laughed: "You taught these two!"
Qi Long really has no such experience of classmates hurting each other, because he is relatively young, and his fellow disciples always take care of him when they see him.
The only one who can hurt each other is Gao Dongqiang, but the two of them basically hurt each other on stage, not in private. I sent your shoes away to wash your coat the day before the performance.
It's amazing, that is, adding more vinegar to the bowl of noodles he eats. He can't compare with his nephews.
He was chatting happily in the background, and soon arrived at the commercial performance. Performance session.
This time, Qi Long and Dong Qiang’s program was the “Deyun Poker” they had played before.
As soon as they came up, the two brothers started fighting after picking up the last show. Qi Long said that Dong Qiang had IQ problems when he was a child, his brain was not fully developed, and his cerebellum was not developed at all.
Dong Qiang was dissatisfied on the spot, and the two competed.
Of course, you can't play live poker directly, so compare the pairs first. It's not the real job of pairing. You don't need to compare the subtle ones, just do some funny ones.
Dongqiang wrote the first couplet: [Every flower and grass is red, lush, beautiful and beautiful]
Qi Long shook his head disdainfully, opened his mouth and answered: [A man and a woman go up, down, left, left, right, right, BABA]
"What is BABA?"
"Never played an arcade before? You can get an extra life!"
"I understand, up and down, left, right and left will give you an extra life!"
"right!"
The audience burst into laughter, and Qi Long smiled slightly: "It's my turn to come up with a question. I'll give you a long one, which will make it difficult for you to die!"
"Come as you please!"
[Huangkou children, grazing on the grassland, looking at sheep, cattle, and stars! 】
Dong Qiang thought for a long time and had no answer.
Qi Long snorted coldly: "Listen up, my second line is, Teacher Yu Qian sneaks up on you in the middle of the night, asking for hugs, hugs, and kisses!"
The audience burst into laughter again.
Dong Qiang waited for everyone to finish laughing, then pulled him back: "Wait a minute, you are the first calligrapher in the first couplet!"
"Teacher Yu Qian's head is green!" Qi Long responded confidently.
Dong Qiang clapped his hands: "You are right to say this, but it won't work. It's not fair to the pair. You prepared it in advance and memorized it. I wasn't prepared!"
"It's not fair, let's make it fair!" Qi Long took out the playing cards, and the two of them piled up, and now it's time to get started!
Whoever loses will admit that there is something wrong with his brain!
The on-site effect is still very good, the ticket price of the commercial performance is not low, and the audience who can come to support are all Deyun Club audiences, and they are also familiar with Deyun cross talk actors.
Every time Qi Long and Dong Qiang took out a card, there would be shouts of support for these actors.
Most of the baggage is the baggage from the previous table games, but there is a lot more content and some of the baggage has been refined.
For example, Wang Jiulong, who admires martial arts, always stretches out his hands to stop others from teasing him. He directly pulls out his hair. Zhang Jiuling's hair is almost bald.
In order to deal with Wang Jiulong, Qi Long took out a Lang Heyan, bald head, where can you go without hair?
In addition, Zhang Jiuling, who washed people's clothes, Zhou Jiuliang, who mailed people's shoes separately, and other things that happened yesterday were also temporarily included in the cross talk between the two.
It made the whole audience laugh.
Poker cards are higher and higher as they are played. After the crane character is over, it is time for the cloud character.
Facing Gao Dongqiang who played Yue Yunpeng, everyone thought Qi Long would produce a more popular actor.
Unexpectedly, he took out one: "Kong Yunlong!"
"Can you, Kong Yunlong, control Yue Yunpeng?"
"When Yue Yunpeng was working as a waiter, Kong Yunlong was the hotel security guard. When Yue Yunpeng was slapped by a customer, Kong Yunlong helped slap him."
"Does it make sense to slap someone for me? That was in the past. Can Kong Yunlong control Yue Yunpeng now?"
"You let Yue Yunpeng hit Xiali on a motorcycle, you let Yue Yunpeng train with a national-level boxer, and you let Yue Yunpeng get blown away by firecrackers?"
"You're going too far. Why is Yue Yunpeng so fat that he gets knocked away?"
"Isn't that serious? Kong Yunlong who dares to light a lantern in the toilet to seek death is the scorpion daddy of Deyun Club, his only one!"
"What nonsense witticisms are you talking about?" Dong Qiang said helplessly: "What's the point of seeking death? Crosstalk actors have to amuse everyone!"
Qi Long spread his hands: "If Kong Yunlong is no longer seeking death, we will definitely cry. Is he okay? Who wouldn't be happy after hearing his experience?
You Yue Yunpeng is funny with your expressions and words, Kong Yunlong is funny with your life! "
What he said was so righteous and the audience applauded!
Later, Qi Long and Dong Qiang took out each other's cards and insisted that you can control me, which also gave everyone a fresh experience of quarreling.
This quarrel is not about scolding others, it is about scolding yourself.
In order to prove that Qi Long is better than Gao Dongqiang, Gao Dongqiang said on stage: "In cross talk, you are often my father. Of course a father can take care of his son!"
"That's a cross talk. In real life, I regard you as my father!"
"No, no, no, you are my dad!"
"You are my father!"
The audience, who have always watched comedians take advantage of each other on stage, saw each other taking advantage of each other for the first time. Such a fresh feeling also made everyone laugh from ear to ear.
The two also played a game of "Who's Who's Dad" on the stage. Different from the normal game, they both went towards recognizing relatives.
It was also a reverse joke, which was applauded by everyone.
Guo Degang, who was watching the excitement in the background, told his disciples that you should watch your uncle handle the burden.
Crosstalk actors often pretend to compliment each other or fight with each other on stage. This kind of "you must be my dad today" quarrels are still rare.
This triggered unexpected laughter from the audience, so if you find a baggage, you don’t have to throw it upright, you can also throw it backwards.
This can actually have unexpected effects.
On the stage, cross talk is not a table game after all, it must have a bottom line. Qi Long hid a card from the beginning, saying it was a very important life-saving card, and would play it out at the end.
Everyone was curious about what card it was at the beginning. Later, Dong Qiang's Qi Long card won. Qi Long had no choice but to play Yu Qian and defeated the so-called Dou Ni anti-king Qi Long by praising the Queen.
Gao Dongqiang naturally brought out Guo Degang to deal with Yu Qian, and the two started again.
"My senior brother is just a loser, how can he compare to your senior brother?" Gao Dongqiang said angrily.
"Your senior brother has high ratings in filming. My senior brother is nothing in filming. Your senior brother is even better!"
"In the cross talk, my senior brother's father and your senior brother are inseparable. My senior brother's wife and your senior brother are inextricably linked and have an indescribable relationship. Your senior brother is so strong."
Finally, Qi Long bowed down again and reluctantly took out a whole set of cross talk cards hidden in his pocket.
"Hey, room card."
"Don't take everything out!"
"I found this massage card, this one!" Qi Long showed it to everyone. It was a billboard among playing cards, with Deyun Theater painted on it and a crowd of spectators below.
Dong Qiang was confused: "What's the use of your billboard?"
"Did you see that? The audience is Guo Degang's parents. Do you care?"
"Isn't this a joke?"
The two bowed, and a program that was filled with cheers from the audience from beginning to end ended.
Guo and Yu, who came on stage next, were quite amused when they took the job, saying who could control whom?
"You care about me. I recognize you as your father. You care about me asking for pocket money. I'll give you pocket money?"
"Do you admit it?"
"Hahaha, Qi Long Dongqiang's program just now was called "Deyun Poker". It was adapted from my master Mr. Hou's cross talk "Business Card Poker", and it also reminded me of the old man.
To be honest, I really miss my master. I had a dream about it two days ago. He told me that I am bored down there and there is no one to praise me. Disciple, give me your praise to my master! "
"Me? Come on, I want to send my master off. They are the right couple!"
The audience laughed, and Guo Degang also looked at Yu Qian in surprise: "You are such a good apprentice!"
One sentence is to open the door to the baggage. After showing Qi Long and others' show, he started to tell his own jokes.
When Qi Long and Dong Qiang arrived backstage, they were dragged by Luan Yunping to discuss whether they wanted to do the whole job in the reverse scene?
So during the show, when Guo Degang asked someone to perform on stage, Qi Long said: "We have a small show together!"
Qi Long, as a narrator, told the story in a deep voice in front of the microphone: "Once upon a time, there was an army, and there was a fool in the army!"
When he said this, Gao Dongqiang held his head high as an instructor, and the other crosstalk actors stood in a row and took a step forward.
Luan Yunping looked around with dull eyes before taking a step forward. When Qi Long mentioned fool, everyone looked at Luan Yunping.
Qi Long's narration continued: "There was going to be a war. We distributed weapons, but the fool didn't get the weapons. At this time, the fool asked."
Luan Yunping scratched his nose with his index finger: "Sir, why don't I have a weapon?"
Gao Dongqiang coughed twice: "You are an elite member of our army. You don't need weapons. When you go to the battlefield, you only need to make an eight-digit gesture with your hands and shout, 'I'll kill you with a pistol'!"
After that, everyone went to the battlefield, and everyone ran and said, "Charge!"
Only Luan Yunping was there, with a dull look on his face: "I'll shoot you to death with a pistol!"
Qi Long continued to narrate: "The battle was very fierce. All the teammates who were in front fell down, and he was the only one left in the army. But he felt that the weapon was very effective because he saw that the enemies on the opposite side were also falling.
At this time, the enemy on the opposite side came up to search, and the fool hid behind the tree. "
Luan Yunping looked at his fingers: "When he comes up, I will shoot him to death with a pistol!"
Qi Long left the front of the microphone and walked out from the side stage on the other side.
Luan Yunping jumped out from the table and pointed his hand at Qi Long: "I'll kill you with a pistol, I'll kill you with a pistol!"
At this time, Qi Long pushed his hands forward and shouted in a fool's tone like Luan Yunping:
"Tanks will crush you, tanks will crush you!"
"Oh, are there fools here?" Yu Qian subconsciously praised him, causing the whole audience to burst into laughter.
Guo Degang looked confused: "How did you convince Luan Yunping to play a fool? Did your uncle ask you to do this!"
"He brought it up on his own initiative!" Qi Long said he would not take the blame.
Guo Degang held the fan in his arms: "Who are you lying to? It must be you who did it. I will shoot you to death with a machine gun!"
"Hahahahaha!"
(End of chapter)