Chapter 98 "I want to bring goods"
The conversation at the beginning was over. The two introduced themselves briefly and talked about the four skills of cross talk: speaking, learning, teasing and singing. Qi Long asked Dong Qiang what he was good at, and he said he was good at learning.
"What are you good at studying?"
"There are so many, including those flying in the sky, running on the ground, ducks in the water, jumping in the grass nests, all kinds of opera singing, people talking and birds singing, small and large businesses shouting, people from various provinces talking, and mute gesticulating." Gao Dongqiang List them one by one.
Qi Long was surprised: "I asked about what you are good at. Are you good at all of these?"
"He's good at everything!"
"Then you show everyone, the first one, the one flying in the sky, come on." Qi Long thought.
Gao Dongqiang: "What to study?"
"Plastic bag!" Qi Long's eyes lit up, he thought of a good idea, and looked at Gao Dongqiang.
"plastic bag?"
"Yes, when the wind blows, that plastic bag sometimes still tumbles in the air when the wind is strong. You take a plastic bag and flip it backwards for a week. Come on, start your performance!"
"Go, go, go, I can't come? Is there anyone who knows how to use plastic bags?" Gao Dong pushed him hard.
Qi Long looked at him with disgust, raised his hands above his head and began to sway like an emoticon, and his body began to twitch: "This is not a plastic bag, it is easy to learn!"
"No, no, no, come on, flip backwards!"
Before Gao Dongqiang finished speaking, Qi Long walked to the side of the wheat stand, used his feet to jump, and did a backflip on the spot!
"Okay!" The audience was stunned, and cheers and applause spread throughout the venue.
No one could have imagined that Qi Long would actually do a backflip!
This is Qi Long showing off his kung fu again after his performance in the variety show.
Even if he usually plays a big bodyguard in a small theater, he just does a carp kick and a backflip. This is the first time I've seen him. It's fresh and beautiful!
"Ouch!" Gao Dongqiang also acted with a face full of surprise.
Qi Long shook his coat: "Are you convinced?"
"You really have the skills, but I can't come!"
"Look, if you're not good at it, just say you're not good at it. If you have to say you're good at it, it's embarrassing. Just say what you're best at!"
Gao Dongqiang: "What I'm best at in school is business and sales!"
Qi Long asked him to show a section, and Dong Qiang immediately opened his hand and started selling vegetables.
[Spicy cilantro and green peppers~ Chives, tender celery, lentils, eggplants, cucumbers, winter melons, sea eggplants, radish, carrots, flat radish, young sprouts of Chinese toon, garlic, and leeks~~~]
This section also often appears in cross talk. The long section in the middle requires continuity and a high tone.
Dong Qiang performed well, and he shouted at the top of his lungs. If he sang solo without stretching his voice, it would be because of the muscles in his throat, which turned it into a high-pitched voice.
Everyone also joined in and applauded.
Qi Long didn't wait for him to take a breath before continuing to ask: "The one who sells goldfish!"
[Hey, little goldfish—a few come here or a few, three or two are sold for a cent, toad bones, and field screws! 】
This paragraph is not coherent, but has a long sound, especially the long sound at the beginning of the little goldfish. The long sound lasts for ten seconds, and Dong Qiang's face turned red.
"Douzhier!"
【Sweet and sour bean juice! 】
Qi Long commanded from the side: "Turn the door down, go up, up, follow my hand."
As soon as he raised his hand, Dongqiang's music rose by a key, like a rooster crowing, climbing up a ladder.
Qi Long's hand kept moving up, and Dong Qiang turned into the sound of a dolphin. With his face red and breathless, he finally couldn't help but kick Qi Long: "Is it so high? Come on!"
"If I don't come, why are you selling goods like this now? There's no need!"
"What are you shouting about?"
Qi Long looked at the audience and raised his fingers: "Come on, family members, three, two, one!"
Many of the audience in the venue had participated in online shopping, and they shouted along with Qi Long:
"Up! Chain! Connect!"
Gao Dongqiang was puzzled: "Can we sell the goods now?"
"No, look at it. Hey, the turnover has exceeded one billion. It's so profitable. I'm not going to talk about cross talk with you anymore. I'm going to live broadcast with goods. How fast the money comes in!" Qi Long proud.
Gao Dongqiang stopped him: "Just call 321 and get the link? That won't work. It's not competitive. You can call anyone you want. Why should people buy from you?"
"I can give full play to my creative abilities. I can write the products into songs and sing them to everyone. Until then."
Gao Dongqiang stopped him: "Not at that time, just at this time, you sing a song and we listen."
"Now!"
"Right now, big guy, let him do one and let's see what his joke is, okay?" Gao Dongqiang encouraged the audience to fight Qi Long together.
Qi Long hesitated: "No, there is no accompaniment. The sound teacher knew we were talking about cross talk, so he didn't prepare anything."
"I'm taking it with me!" Dong Qiang took out a guitar from under the table and handed it to Qi Long.
Qi Long: "Why do you bring everything?"
This is a joke that was included in the two crosstalks in the two previous crosstalk competitions.
Qi Long played a few times, then shouted "three two one", then he started to sing:
【I hope to find a Gucci in your Fendi. , want to cry) corner, I hope.]
"Wait a minute, wait a minute, don't wait any longer!" Gao Dong forcefully pulled Qi Long back.
After Qi Long stopped moving, the music continued.
"Hey, are you still pretending to play?"
"Nonsense, this is called half-open wheat!" Qi Long scolded angrily.
This is a mockery of the audience who supported lip-synching at the party.
To be honest, some cross-border non-singers just lip-synced to show off the effect of the party. The key is that their fans have to give them a wash.
That's not called lip-synching, that's called half-synching.
"Well, well, I don't care about that. You can't use this word, right?"
"What's wrong?" "People say 'I hope to find a warm corner in your arms'. What are you doing? I hope to find a crying corner in your graveyard? Don't you curse people? Who betrayed you? Goods?”
Qi Long looked at him with disdain: "Either you say you don't understand, fendi, gucci, these are product brands, luxury goods, bags!"
"Oh, brand? I really don't understand this if I don't have a girlfriend!"
The audience roared, and Qi Long put on an embarrassed smile: "Don't listen anymore!"
"Listen!" Gao Dongqiang asked him to continue.
Qi Long picked up the guitar again, and Dong Qiang took it away for him. He didn't need it anymore, so he could just sing.
A song filled with various brands, begins.
[I hope to find a Gucci corner in your Fendi, I hope to look like a pink Tom Ford in your Tiffany]
Each line of a song carries one or two brands, all of which are so-called affordable luxury brands. After singing about the brand, it starts to appeal to everyone to buy.
【Youcanyoucan buy~, youcanyoucan buy buy buy! ],
Gao Dongqiang: "Hey, did you really write it?"
"Of course, what else is there? Just open your mouth and come!"
[Xiaxia quietly comes to Double Eleven in the past summer. The live broadcast room will give you benefits and good goods. It will be delivered to you within a few days of placing an order. It is so cheap and so cheap that you can’t miss it. 】
[You can’t miss it, the store has subsidized tens of billions; you can’t miss it, these are good products, celebrate Double Eleven, the best time to shop, if you miss the package, you will regret it until the end of the year]
"Hey, this is new to you!" Gao Dongqiang was surprised.
Qi Long said proudly: "How about it, can I go bring the goods?"
"cannot!"
"Why?"
"You can't just sing, you have to speak."
"It's even simpler to say, I use my true feelings to infect consumers, I use my shouting to wake them up, I use price reductions to stimulate them, and I use lies to deceive them."
"Ah?" Gao Dongqiang immediately asked.
Qi Long glanced at him sideways: "No, use money to save money to seduce consumers!"
“It’s not about these discounts, it’s about introducing products!”
"Then it's even simpler. As a crosstalk actor, I am so good at eloquence. If I just introduce any product, what can't be sold? By then..." Qi Long said sarcastically.
"Not that time, just now, I have a mobile phone here, you sell it to him!" Dong Qiang took out a mobile phone and handed it to him.
Qi Long took the phone: "That won't work either!"
"Why can't it work again?"
"Now there is no one person on the anchor saying that, and there are people behind who are answering. When the anchor says, 'Is it very hard for everyone to go to work?', someone behind the camera replies, 'Yes, it's hard', and yes,' it's not clear, so I don't care. It’s awkward to answer the conversation.”
"I'll answer the call for you. The one I praise is the one who answers the call!" Gao Dongqiang shouted immediately.
Qi Long glanced at him and continued to find excuses: "That's not okay. Generally, female anchors have male assistants, and male anchors have female assistants. You are a man!"
"As long as you can sell it, I can come back!" Gao Dongqiang pinched his orchid fingers.
Qi Long had no choice but to shirk it, so he told Gao Dongqiang that he must cooperate with him and introduced the product himself. He exclaimed: Wow, it’s really amazing!
The requirement is: the girlier, the better!
After the two of them were ready, the mobile phones went on sale. Qi Long changed into a strange accent: "Today we are going to recommend a good product to everyone."
"What good product is this?" Gao Dongqiang raised his voice and swayed slightly.
With the reckless character in this variety show, now that he is playing a female, the contrast comes, and everyone can't help but laugh out loud.
Qi Long turned his head: "This is the newly developed Almighty King super mobile phone in my hand. Its functions are very powerful. It has three major functions."
"What are the three major functions?"
"The first function is the super battery life function. As you all know, some mobile phones can charge for two hours and talk for five minutes."
Gao Dongqiang returned to his original voice: "Hey, it takes five minutes to charge and two hours of talk time!"
"It's not important. Just belittle your peers and elevate yourself!"
"Aren't you sorry?" Gao Dongqiang turned around and complained.
"Remember your identity, you are my female assistant, you have to follow my instructions!"
"Okay, okay!"
"Our mobile phone can last for three hundred and sixty-four days, twenty-three hours, fifty-nine minutes and fifty-nine seconds!"
"Wow, it's really amazing. It can last for three hundred and sixty-four days, twenty-three hours, fifty-nine minutes, fifty-nine. Can you add one second to make it one year?"
"No, you know Wahaha Purified Water. It was originally designed to be 600 ml, but when the bottle was produced, it was only 596 ml. They priced it at 596, not even a drop is missing. This is called considering consumers and not making false propaganda!"
"Aren't you lying?" Gao Dongqiang couldn't help but complain.
Qi Long glared at him, and Gao Dongqiang was forced to shout: "Wow, you are so conscientious!"
"You must be curious why the battery life of mobile phones is so long? That's because the batteries are different. Others use ordinary batteries, but our mobile phone battery uses concentrated oil!"
"Concentrated oil?"
"To put it bluntly, it's atomic bomb explosion technology!"
"Ouch!" Dong Qiang was surprised.
Qi Long glared at him.
"Wow, it's really amazing!"
Yesterday, the cross talk name was written as the original cross talk name "Super Hypermarket", but because the content of the cross talk was changed to online delivery, the cross talk name should not be called that. It has been changed to "I want to bring goods".
(End of this chapter)